you're my weakness she said... what is a weakness... its harmful.. it gets you into trouble.. makes u do things you dont want.. its not love.. its not even real.. its selfish.. so selfish and prude... weakness...*
anahat would like to retract this thoughtless and childish outburst... lets write it all over again. with some more insight...
you're my weakness she said... i heard her.. and my heart skipped.. it was the perfect thing to say.. there.. like that.. holding her... it was like the slightest shiver... yet i knew.... she was jus being honest... and i couldn't grudge her that.. she hadn't promised me anything.. rather she had warned.. sinister words.. brave words... i hadn't listed, didn't want to... no fault but mine...
it still felt the world to hear those words.. and echo them in my own heart....
but all that's in the past now...
bygones...
i was talking to an old friend last night... after about eight years we were talking.. really talking.. and she asked me to brief her on what in god's name i'd been doing for the last five yrs i'd been away... and after all the drama and the sympathy hogging.. she said.. u know.. wait for it.. until ur good and ready.. and when u are... itll be perfect..
she may already be right.. id said.. more right than she knew.. more right than I was letting on...
life.. has an extremely sick sense of humour.. but its also strangely generous at times.. its pretty much a goes around comes around sort of setup... is someone puling the strings? who'se to say.. but sometimes it seems to me the 'coincidence' portrays a consciousness of some sort behind it all.. but thats for another time and another post...
time... pepperoni pizza and distraction heals all... i've had more than my fair share of each...
i'm ready...
so like a wise young man said to me once on a train journey through the real india... we shall soon see... **
Did I say that I loathe you?
Did I say that I want to Leave it all behind?
I can't take my mind off of you
I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind off of you
I can't take my mind off you***
*cf: A Season of Faith's Imperfection, Things Left Unsaid, Anahat Arora
**cf: Dr. Karthik Ramanna Ph. D, during the Azad Bharat Raial Yatra 1997
***cf: The Blower's Daughter, Damien Rice
16 comments:
that which does not kill you, shall only make you stronger.
hang in there...sometimes being ready isn't enough, it just comes and hits you at the least expected moment...that is the beauty of it all.
and as far as pepperoni pizza, diet coke and saunf sheeshas are concerned...there is always room for more :)
why are you so weird dude?
All this f-in waiting around and "i'm ready..." nonsense - whats wrong with you? You keep waiting and hovering and everything you want will pass you by while you stand at the edge with your hand and thumb still high waiting for a lift. That thumb will only have usefulness as a cork at that point.
Go find what you want - and make it yours.
Ima sort you out when i see you.
Haha! Typical difference between a girl's advice (wait and it'll be perfect) and a guy's advice (comment above)! :))
moreso typical that Ana-beta's blog falls a wee-bit onto the girl's side.
it's my metrossexual sensitive side!!! shhhhh!
hahahah... lukin forward to thursday night madness brother!
Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!
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