an ode to sunshine...

Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance
For a break that would make it okay
There's always one reason
To feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seeps from my veins
Let me be empty
And weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight*

*snip... a few years gone by... pilani and conversations under shaded tree lined walks...quizzical introductions...

diwali.. the festival of whiskey shots lights taash and broken payals...

ihc... swimming the summer away... on the lawns in front of american diner.. a huge crush... the fuzzz of unfamiliar niceness...an unusual woman.. a beautiful woman.. strong independent and proud.. oh so proud.. and a little obtuse... but so easily carried away and so easy to fall in love with.. so easy to believe that she could fall...

of a smile to die for and eyes to drown in...

messages and fleeting conversations... balcony of the library.. black coffee and sugar doughnuts... and eliot.. seth.. woolf... the play of light and darkness and a fascination ever growing...

lsr annual day... compromises and smiles.. the rock show and big chill...

midnight conversations and ministry of sound... possessiveness and the nicest sense of something that can be...

turtle cafe and reality... confusion and hurt.. mistaken intentions.. or convenient altercations of priorities.. giving second chances... and snatching possibilities...

life carries on.. and people come and go.. taking of michelangelo..

msn.. and the typing of closely held outbursts...

celebrity weddings at the taj... impressing the parents.. missed dinners.. desert counters... and forgiveness that will never come..

weekend trips and rock concerts... beer dwelling creatures of mojos and pecos... missing reality and rushed goodbyes...

endless messages about nothing...

an ode to sunshine... to a possibility... never explored never given a chance.. an ode to chance..

an ode to a possibility still...

an ode to love.. and little posts of scribbling your mind for the world to read and judge... and forgotten birthdays..

We spotted the ocean at the head of the trail
Where are we going, so far away
And somebody told me that this is the place
Where everythings better, everythings safe
Walk on the ocean
Step on the stones
Flesh becomes water
Wood becomes bone
And half and hour later we packed up our things
We said wed send letters and all those little things
And they knew we were lying but they smiled just the same
It seemed theyd already forgotten wed came**

*cf: Angel, Sarah McLachlan
**cf: Walk on the Ocean, Toad the Wet Sproket